Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I wish i was in the wii world.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Randomize
