we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I cockslap morals
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
