Apparently you make a good broom.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
