So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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