1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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