I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
North Korea, Best Korea!
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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