yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
