He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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