how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize