I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize