i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
