careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
