I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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