Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
