I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Drunk is a universal language darling
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
