i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
