Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
