On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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