I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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