I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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