why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Randomize
