i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
God gave him joint rollers for hands
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
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