Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize