I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
