after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
should my penis look like a turkey
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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