Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize