I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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