just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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