just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
