It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Randomize
