I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
In other news, I just burned my penis
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Randomize
