You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
