I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
