Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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