Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
