i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
