you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
