sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Randomize
