You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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