we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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