i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
