if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
