so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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