My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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