I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize