Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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