wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
