We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
