She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
i am craving dick and cupcakes
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
