I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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